nabokov + coachella
I intend to write here in some ways like a diary. Though of course that isn’t anything new or very special or very private in the current era… today I am thinking of Nabokov.
I found out recently, that he spent a hot summer in Utah in just cotton shorts and tennis shoes. Chasing butterflies, petting cocker spaniel puppies, whatnot…
I’ve thought a lot about Russia this week. I do think I’m always considering Russia but this week in particular. I’ve been falling asleep to stories about Slavic fairytales and obscure words with no direct translations into English… the idea of only speaking English feels more and more limiting to me as I grow older. As I grow better at French, I find there are words in French that suit me more than some words in English. Though of course English is my first and only true love! Clumsily, softly, lovingly, that is how English is spoken, is written…… the way words sound out loud or appear on a page is something that delights me, it always has. Pairs of words, long meandering phrases, runon sentences. English is the love of my life.
And my favorite of all prose styles is Nabokov’s. Though this is so so interesting!! Because for somebody whose first language is not English, to be the great pinnacle of lyrical prose!!? that’s a feat. That’s something to be in awe of, even fifty something years later. I would like to include some blurbs from Lolita (as i’m re-reading it now) to demonstrate my LOOOOVE for his choices…
“She kept lifting handfuls of fine sand and letting it pour through her fingers”
“All at once we were madly, clumsily, shamelessly, agonizingly in love with each other; hopelessly, i should add, because that frenzy of mutual possession might have been assuaged only by our actually imbibing and assimilating every particle of each other’s soul and flesh”
“[…]frail, honey-hued shoulders”
“her fingers were a luminous crimson as they tried to blot out the sun, and she uttered hiccups of laughter”
There are trillions more but that’s up to where I’ve gotten and so I don’t want to go hunting for more at the moment. A true master of adjectives… one day I hope to have command over French in such a way as he does. I hope to even command English in half the manner he was able.
I am so envious this year of those who have gone to Coachella which is bizarre to me because I’ve not felt the desire to go to Coachella since I was twelve and Emma Chamberlain was vlogging her time there. I wonder if that’s a symbol of anything, if there are certain things that will return? Social media wise? Maybe a rise back into very tailored and semi-authentic content like the Emma chambies and antonio garzas of the world… i go back and watch those 2017-2019 videos often (even though i guess there’s better things to do with my life) because it still gives me this feeling of fomo that’s almost nice. like i am watching people with friends be happy and i have no choice but to be happy for them.
maybe next year i will go to coachella and give this a wee ponder there but i am emetophobic and very broke so that will be a goal to work towards. i’ve got to find an apartment for august
if u have any interest in reading a summery article about mr nabokov: https://theamericanscholar.org/net-gains/#:~:text=Nabokov%20was%2044.,and%20had%20a%20tubercular%20look.
april 15th 2025